My Tomatoes Are Dying and I'm Writing a Book Anyway
Hey friends,
I am in full-fledged book writing mode over here. While I am really excited about this project, I am also feeling a lot of other emotions as well. Is this going to be any good? Am I behind? Will anyone care about this? My writing sucks. The list goes on.
This is something I have experienced before. Although, most of the writing I have done in my career has been preparing sermons. And that is essentially how this newsletter started. I missed writing sermons.
I had a lot of these similar feelings over the past 15 years, but most of the time those sermons were shared with a congregation and went into a file. Never to be seen or heard again. The stakes are much bigger this time. This will stay in the world forever, and its potential reach is limitless.
I am realizing that book writing is different. Much different. It is going to take some time figuring out. My sermons were typically about 3000 words, and I am comfortable with that. I learned very quickly to say the most that you can with the fewest words possible. There just wasn’t much room for the extra. Well, a book can and often times should handle the extra. And I am finding that is hard for me. I just want to say it like it is and move on. I am not one for much elaboration or drawing things out. I like to say it plainly and memorably and be done with it.
If I don’t want this book to be 1/3 the length it needs to be, I have to dig deep. I have to change. I have to learn how to set the scene. Describe things in detail. Express my emotion. I have to adapt. I have to grow.
You know, growth is a funny thing. What comes to mind for me right now as I think about growth is the garden that we planted a month ago. This is our first ever attempt at a vegetable garden. Here is a picture of what it looked like on May 2nd:
We got everything planted. We made a plan for watering. This spot on our back deck gets full sun exposure. What could possibly go wrong?
Well, let’s see. We immediately started battling spider mites. One of our pepper plants got some kind of bacterial infection. One of our tomato plants got a horrible case of early blight. It ended up being so bad that we had to toss it and get a new one. Our dog won’t stop messing with the plants on the bottom shelf.
Let’s just say it has gone nothing like I expected. But as I take a step back and think about what has happened the last month in the garden, I realize that we have just taken it day by day. Moment by moment. We have overcome one problem at a time, and although it doesn’t seem like it (because I think we all tend to focus on the things that go wrong) there has still been some substantial growth. Look at the garden this week:
It hasn’t been perfect, but some fruit is starting to show.
And that is my prayer for this book. Just take it a day at time. Make some changes where I need to. Challenge myself to dig deeper. Take some stuff out. Start over at times. That is just what it’s going to take.
With that said, this newsletter will be changing a little bit during this season. I need to prune some things.
That word keeps catching me, because it's the one Jesus uses in John 15. The vinedresser in that passage walks the rows and cuts back the branches that are already bearing fruit, and he does it on purpose, so they bear even more the next season. Pruning is the thing you do to a healthy plant. It's a sign the vine is worth tending. So, when I tell you I'm pruning the newsletter, that's what I mean by it.
There will still be an essay every week so don’t worry about that. I am not going quiet on you. There will still be some sneak peeks and behind the scenes book content for paid subscribers. None of that is changing. This newsletter will just become more personal. It is going to be something that grows out of my actual week instead of a buttoned-up piece that I sweat over for 5 days straight. And then 3 small things will land at the bottom of every newsletter from here on out. And those 3 things are:
A Practice: One small, low-pressure thing to try that week. Nobody’s grading you.
A Recommendation: Something that I think that will be worth your time. A podcast, a book, an article, or maybe a show.
A Small Joy: One good thing from my week. Personal and honest. This will give you a small window into my world.
And y’all, this is me leaning in. I am not stepping back. I want you all closer for this stretch. The book is a deeper version of everything that brought you here in the first place, and these newsletters are how I am going to let you watch it happen in real time, mess and all.
This week I started treating my cell phone like a landline. I keep it plugged in somewhere in the house and just answer calls or respond to texts when I walk by or when I decide to, not the other way around. I have included a video here that inspired me to do it. You should give it a try and let me know what you think.
If you are a writer, I can’t recommend this book enough…
Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott.
This book was recommended to me by a friend of mine and it is fantastic. This book was released back in 1994, but it is hilarious and so so helpful. If you aren’t a writer, you should still read any book by Anne Lamott. Just search her work and pick one. You won’t be disappointed.
Last week on Thursday I made a last-minute hospital visit to see an elderly woman named Betty who is having some heart problems. I read some scripture and prayed with her, and it was so special. But after my prayer she looked up at me and said some of the kindest things (I had never met her before). Betty’s words really touched me. She said I had a gift for words and not everyone does. She was so sweet. And she had no idea how much I needed her words. I keep waiting for some sign that I'm not crazy to be doing this.
Who needs your kind words this week?
Thanks for being here, y’all. You mean so much to me and I feel so blessed to be on this journey with you.
If you want access to some of the special behind-the-scenes content that will be released in the next few months, be sure and upgrade to paid subscription.
If $5/month isn’t in the budget right now just shoot me an email at beaustringer@gmail.com and we will work something out.
Keep becoming.
-Beau